My name is Katie. I was born in 1985 directly amid the HIV/AIDS pandemic and scare. As I grew older my parents told me stories of complications my mother endured while in labor with me. To make a long story short she lost a lot of blood and I remember my parents retelling to me at a young age how my father gathered family, friends, and co-workers to donate blood so they could ensure her a safe transfusion. Throughout my youth, while attending school, my classmates and I would learn about AIDS and HIV transmission and the quick and powerful affect it had on the world. For me, and I imagine for many children of my generation and upbringing, there was little to worry about. We were young, educated but also sheltered, and therefore, undeniably ‘safe’ from a disease transmitted mainly through sexual contact and IV drug needle sharing (as at least was explained to us). Fortunately, I have emerged into my mid-twenties HIV free, my mother received transfusions free of the HIV virus and neither of us has known what it is like to lose someone to HIV/AIDS. Although my emotions were with those affected by the virus I never took action to help the cause. It would be nearly a decade later that opportunity to join the fight against AIDS would knock at my door.

I became involved with Until There’s A Cure simply by chance and although I do not have a personal experience with this virus I have come to know it from a new and different perspective. My experience with UTAC has put me in contact with various individuals affected by the HIV virus, whether it is with the disease itself or knowing people who have suffered. These blog contributions will be the story of my involvement with Until There’s A Cure, as someone who wants to help continue raising awareness about the illness, as someone with a desire to give voice to the organization’s story, and as someone who wants to learn more about a virus that continues to inflict an estimated 33.4 million people worldwide.

Although I feel I have been thoroughly educated about AIDS I shamefully admit that until I began working with Until There’s A Cure I had let its power and significance as a virus escape me. Until I began reading the stories of individuals living with HIV and researching the statistics of the virus I had figured it was a mere waiting game until a cure surfaced. It wasn’t until I took the opportunity to work alongside UTAC that I realized how many people continue to become infected with HIV, how much still needs to be accomplished in the quest for an AIDS cure, and how anyone regardless of age, race, gender, sexual orientation or upbringing is still at risk for contracting the disease. Until there’s a cure it is my hope to remind people across the globe of the significance of the pandemic and get people involved, again.

YES! Not everyone is an activist! And we must respect this…not all people are prepared to come out of their HIV closet because others want them too! They are not less than anyone..many of them are still dealing with the shame that comes with the illness. Or they are trying to protect their family members…. especially when there is so much ignorance and stigma with HIV/AIDS.We have to respect other peoples’ choices and views! We are their role models …so if we have it in us to be activists and advocate, let us do that for those that don’t feel prepared or ready yet! Or maybe they will never be! And it’s not because they don’t want to fight for the cause! You see, that is where people get it so wrong! Just go back to when you were not disclosing! There is nothing someone could have told you or me that would have made us come out! You go through cycles! That is why we had the Larry Kramers and Ryan Whites that helped us so much in this cause! Yes! HIV/AIDS is being minimized and not really talked about as much! And we (the ones that are ready ) must advocate!Educate and STOMP on stigma! And when it is time for us to retire ..maybe those who looked at our blogs, speeches, vlogs, twitter, facebook will contine!I want people that are not ready to come out of the HIV closet or be an activist to know that it’s ok! You are not a coward! How I was told, some people were being called out by someone on facebook that is an activist! And maybe in her ignorance or desperation wanted everyone to show their faces! NO! It’s not that simple!No one has the right to force you into anything! Just learn from us! and many of us are fighting in our own way to get the word out. Keep on learning from our stories! There will be a time that will come where saying I am HIV positive will be like saying I have diabetes ! I really hope! In the meantime keep yourselves healthy! And take your meds! This is most important! So we can be ready for when the cure comes.   I really pray and hope it happens in my lifetime. ♥

Love and Light, Maria T Mejia

This article was cross-posted from “A Girl Like Me,” a program of The Well Project and TheBody.com.  

Subscribe to her YouTube channel MariasJournal (and ours, while you’re at it! UntilTheresACure)

Make a bold statement for National HIV Testing Day on June 27 with these stunning bracelets.  1 in 5 HIV+ people do not know they are infected because they have not been tested.  Don’t wait; GET TESTED.

And help raise awareness about the importance of Getting Tested.  Wearing The Bracelet makes a powerful statement that you have been tested and invites others to Join the Conversation, because one of the greatest risks of HIV/AIDS today is too many people believe it is no longer a problem.

Macramé Stone Adjustable Bracelets -$5.00

These stricking bracelets are made using the macramé technique which involves hand knotting the cord to create unique designs. The knots hold the stone in place securely, and the cord is waxed, making it very hard wearing and long lasting.
The center stone is an oval white with an embossed ribbon.
Adjustable; fits 6″ – 11.5″ wrists. Perfect for all ages and sizes!

Increase awareness, compassion, understanding, and responsibility

… Until There’s A Cure

(But even sometimes my spirit has a limit!!)

Sometimes I feel like I can’t continue. I feel that the energy gets low. This is normal to me … it has always been like this. Ever since I was a teen I had this fear that I had to live every moment to the extreme. This is a good thing, but it can be a bad thing also for people living with HIV or any disease — and even for someone who is healthy.

I think what happens to me is that I live on a constant roller coaster. Ever since I changed my eating habits and practice forgiveness — trying to be in the light and send light to others that may not have love for me — it’s getting better. But as many of us know, we have good days and not so good days … and sometimes I suffer from fatigue and I HATE HATE HATE to feel fatigued!!! Just being there doing nothing … I know I am a very hyperactive person and I am a high energy person. Even if I am laying down trying to relax or even meditating, my mind always tries to roam somewhere on the things I have to do. So basically when my body shuts down, I push it with my spirit! I refuse to let my body control my spirit, but I am learning that I have to balance everything and not go from one extreme to another!

It’s OK if we don’t get to do everything we planned to do today … there is always tomorrow.

It’s OK to just be lazy and not do anything. It’s OK to say NO to others when you don’t have anything to even give yourself! Because in the end, if you get sick or overwhelmed, you won’t be able to give ANYTHING to anyone … including yourself.

I am learning to try and not stress on the future … the what ifs … the future is not promised! Our past is gone, so I want to live for today! But here is where it gets tricky for me: LIVE TODAY TO THE FULLEST, BUT NOT WITH THE ANXIETY THAT THERE WON’T BE A TOMORROW. So yes, my spirit is strong as hell! Yes, I am a strong woman! But even the strong fall.

I don’t want to fall. I want to continue on living healthy and having that perfect balance. So even though many years have passed living with this virus, I am still in cycles with it … or maybe I am just getting older and wiser … I don’t know.

I just know that every time I get up and feel 100% healthy, I try to do it all … live it all, but then the time comes when my body says: Maria, slow down or I will make you slow down! So what does my stubborn self do? Push myself to the limit. That is why I know that my spirit is stronger than my body and mind!

I believe that is why when I am emotionally sad or I feel my spirit weak is when I have felt the sickest and this is like a vicious cycle. I hate to feel sick, but I make myself sick taking my body to the limit. So then I find myself laying in bed, not feeling well..thinking too much! And BAM! My spirit stumbles. So I can’t do this to myself anymore!!!

I need to step back and relax and breathe … really enjoy life and the days I am feeling 100%. Sometimes I also think that I do this to myself because I feel that I want to take advantage of feeling strong. I don’t know.

I also have to accept that I am HUMAN … and that we don’t feel 100% all the time! HIV negative people get sick also. They get low on energy also! I have to stop being so hard on myself and my body … even if my spirit always pulls me through.

I have sat and thought — and even friends that observe me have noticed — that I don’t rest how I should. I think I am resting … but am I? Really, let’s think about it … do we really rest our bodies and mind?

Maybe this is one of the reasons that I have been undetectable for more than 11 years and my T cells never go up more than 399 … never ever! Even though I don’t get sick or hospitalized (thank God), this is causing a form of stress in me that I have learned to live with all my life!

So this woman will try and chill and relax. I hope if someone can relate to this, you will also do the same.

There is always tomorrow. Enjoy today, but with measure … hold your loved ones … take time to walk, to watch your favorite show, to share with your family … just put yourself first! There is always tomorrow! And if tomorrow never comes, at least you will leave this life knowing you gave your best and lived the best you could without pushing yourself.

So yes, my SPIRIT pulls me through, and I am thankful for this! But I want spirit, mind, body and soul in harmony as one.

Love and Light,
Maria T Mejia

This article was cross-posted from “A Girl Like Me,” a program of The Well Project and TheBody.com.

Love, Maria Mejia

Subscribe to her YouTube channel MariasJournal (and ours, while you’re at it! UntilTheresACure)

I’ve been HIV positive for 20 years, 10 of them without any HIV meds; and for the last 10 years I have been on HIV medication. If I could go back 20 years, I wouldn’t change a thing. I really believe (and this is only my opinion) that not taking the high dosages of AZT (Retrovir, zidovudine) that were offered 20 years ago saved my life.

Not everyone should wait this long to get on meds. All bodies are different.  My T-cell count went down to a dangerous 39; that is when I said “It is time.” I always follow my heart and gut instincts.

I was on Trizivir (AZT/3TC/abacavir) for the past 10 years. Recently I had another gut instinct: I said “Enough of Trizivir.” The reason for this is because of the AZT in it,  conversations with friends and of course my HIV specialist! Although my  viral load was undetectable, I really felt it was time for a change … and so I did.

I was put on Atripla (efavirenz/tenofovir/FTC), which was what I’d wanted. I made the best decision for me. Less than a month and half later my T cells are now 399 — they have never been so high! And my CD4 percentage went from 22 percent to 27 percent, which is awesome! I am still undetectable and very blessed.

So the one piece of advice I would give myself would’ve been the same — I wouldn’t change a thing. Now for those newly diagnosed: Things are different now! You have more options. You shouldn’t wait till your immune system is destroyed like mine was. Take your meds and live a healthy and positive lifestyle. Please find a doctor you can communicate with and listens to you. Be proactive with your illness; and most important; do your research! These are our bodies, and we are in a learning process along with our doctors.

This is the key to living a healthy life with HIV/AIDS: Don’t minimize the illness! If you don’t take care of yourself and do what you are supposed to do, you can get very ill and even die. All of this is preventable!

Please love yourself and take your Meds when you and your doctor feel it is time for you to start. It will be hard at the beginning; you may feel sick while the body adapts to the medication. This is normal. But after that you will start to feel better, and with the HIV medications your immune system will have help against the virus.

Life is beautiful! And again, keep yourself healthy until the cure comes!

-Maria-

This article was cross-posted from “A Girl Like Me,” a program of The Well Project and TheBody.com.  Subscribe to her YouTube channel MariasJournal (and ours, while you’re at it! UntilTheresACure)

Introducing the Hope Bracelets – $15

These beautiful beaded bracelets are modeled after Meditation beads. Meditation beads have been used by various cultures for meditations, protection from negative energy and to relieve stress.

Wear these Beads of Hope as a reminder that there is a Cure for HIV/AIDS…we are not there yet.

When our staff discussed why we were appreciative of our mothers and what we have learned from them, surprisingly (or not so surprisingly, considering we’ve all come into the same line of work) we found that all of our mother’s had impressed upon us the importance of always giving back and doing good in the world.  Whether for other people, animals, the environment – you name it – we were taught to always be nice to whatever is around us at the time.

So this year, we all made a pact to honor our Moms on Mother’s Day with tributes instead of simply presents.  By this we meant, the gift – whether tangible or non-tangible – needs to be something meaningful and that gives back to the greater good.  There are so many options to choose from now that fulfill the traditional Mother’s Day gift ideas while also giving back when you purchase from one of the hundreds of thousands of non-profits offering “gifts that give twice” (yes, we just so happen to offer a fabulous selection ourselves  www.until.org).  We realize that not everyone has the pleasure of celebrating Mother’s Day with their mothers, and not all moms are the type who want or need more tangible things, so some of us have chosen to make a donation in their names (one option being our campaign Educate a Woman, Educate a Nation, aimed to raise awareness and $10,000 for the 16 million HIV+ women and girls worldwide).   And then there are the types like my mother – for years I viewed her as “the worst” and such a drag to shop for every single gift-giving holiday, because she downright dislikes receiving more things.  But our Executive Director gave me a fantastic idea: why not do an activity with her that gives back?  BRILLIANT.  The one thing I have learned over the years is that the only correct gift for my mom is the gift of my time, and to also spend it giving back made her ecstatic.  So this year we will be volunteering in the community garden on Mother’s Day…and it’s a gift for both of us and the community.

We would like to invite you all to join us in paying tribute to our mothers this year. Please comment below and share with us how your mother inspired you.

Happy Mother’s Day!